Hey Hey Hey Hey, Snoop is here to smoke Celtic everyday

Glasgow, Snoop Dogg’s in the muthafuckin’ hoooouse.

Hey hey hey. What up Celtizzle. Your friend Snoop dee oh double gee is here to bring a little of Long Beach to Glasgow and get things crackalackin.

I know some of y’all might think that Snoop is just swoopin’ in after seein’ that smackdown you just laid on my boy Messi’s head and I just wanna chill with Kevin Garnett. Well Snoop don’t roll like that. I know its been a few days since you heard about this, but in his old age the Snoop Lion likes to take his time.

Contrary to popular belief, as I enter a more mature stage of my life, Snoop Lions is broadening his horizons. I’m getting into art and I’m watching high class French movies where when the chicks make out and its deep. In more ways than one.  I’m also trading in those NFL jerseys for some of those soccer shirts. Droppin’ those Kansas City Chiefs Larry Johnson jerseys like they hot, know what I’m sayin’? Where else can I show I watch sports AND advertise shit. You Europeans are alright even if your cigarettes smell like shit.

That’s why Snoop is gonna help you Bad Bhoys out, teach you how to spell right and turn those pale ass red haired crackers you got loose on Europe. We’re gonna take the Champions League and curb stomp it until its our bitch, ya dig?

So I’m here and from now on Celtic aren’t gonna be the Lisbon Lions, they gonna be the Snoop Lions.

Snoop is here and ready to bring a little bit of Los Angeles flavor to Parkhead. Which is just about right cause let me tell you Snoop loves to be parked, when he’s getting head. So get those trophies out of those dusty cabinets and fill them with some of your finest Scottish cristal. Me and my boy Neil Lennon and gonna run this shit. No bombs or murder raps are gonna stop us. I know that some of you might be nervous, but when you’re smoking a fattie and listening to Gary Hooper’s new single with Pharrel you’re gonna wonder what you ever did without me.  

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