REDKNAPP OUT AT SPURS!!!!111! ALL CAPS TIME!!!!!

Euros? Aw they’re ‘triffic, but they’re not the Prem, are they?

Hey remember that week where Harry Redknapp was coaching a team in the title race, beating teams 5-0, getting acquitted from tax evasion, and the leading candidate for the England job? Man, nobody better than Harry. He had a solid gold future laid out before.

Well, its five months later and Harry’s out of a job. Somebody hide the Boddingtons, Harry’s gonna need a drink.

If the rumors are to believed, in an attempt to show who’s got the biggest balls in North London, Spurs Chairman Daniel Levy is about to fire Harry Redknapp. In some ways it’s a no brainer. Harry pissed away a ten point lead on third to Spurs’ biggest rivals, effectively costing them a Champions League spot and condemning them to an offseason of irritating taunts from their gypsy neighbors from Woolwich. Even worse, Harry looked like he totally checked out from the team while he was under consideration for the England job.

You’re right Harry. Villa aren’t very good. SO Y U NO BEAT THEM!??!

Yet on the other hand, Harry is beloved by the media and lead Spurs to their best three seasons in the Premier League. However, its important to remember here that HE BLEW A TEN POINT FUCKING LEAD TO ARSENAL. HE COULDN’T EVEN FUCKING BEAT VILLA! Villa, which lest Keith forget, was coached by ALEX FUCKING MCLEISH.

Ugh. UGH. UUUUUUGH. HARRY I HATE YOU. I HOPE YOU GET LOCKED IN A FUCKING CELL AT FRATTON PARK FOR THE REST OF YOUR NATURAL FUCKING LIFE AND PETER CROUCH FUCKING FEEDS YOU MEAT PIES MADE FROM ROSIE WHILE PORTSMOUTH FANS FLING THEIR FUCKING LEAGUE ONE TICKET STUBS AT YOU FOR THE REST OF YOUR NATURAL FUCKING LIFE.

Actual picture of Skipjack contemplating last season

WE HAD A TEN POINT LEAD ON ARSENAL YOU TWITCHY FUCKING FREELOADER! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH FUN IT WOULD HAVE BEEN TO TAUNT ARSENAL FANS ABOUT GAPS ALL SUMMER?! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH FUN IT WOULD HAVE BEEN TO WATCH ARSENAL GO TO FUCKING EASTERN BUTTFUCKISTAN IN THE EUROPA LEAGUE!?!?!?!?!?!??1/!!

GAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGH. HAVE FUN IN QATAR WITH JAMIE YOU FAT PILE OF GOO!

Alright. Alright. Time to calm down. Spurs need to hire a manager quickly and decisively. Deschamps? Moyes? Mourinho’s kid? It should be a fun month or so. Look for features on potential candidates in the coming weeks. And if Spurs hire Moyes, look for previews from Brian of the Championship teams that Everton will almost certainly be playing next season.

Come to me, you beautiful French siren.

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7 responses to “REDKNAPP OUT AT SPURS!!!!111! ALL CAPS TIME!!!!!

  1. HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

    Let the financial ruin begin!

  2. You get to coach the second best team in North London AND coach in the Europa League, spending exciting nights in Eastern European outposts like the English team’s enjoying now? Wow, who wouldn’t jump at that?

  3. @SA Hey this is literally Moyes’ best and maybe only opportunity to head to a bigger club than Everton. I’d be over this like Maradona on an opium den if I were him

  4. Hahahaha! I think the real reason Sp*rs lost the lead over Arsenal because ‘Arry grew up a Gooner. That and the fact that Sp*rs are crap. Have fun on Thursday nights in the likes of Kazan, Astana, Kharkiv, Sofia, and Maribor!

    Can Gareth Bale handle playing an actual position? Will Jermain Defoe’s snaggletooth & Ledley King’s trick knees continue to strike not fear but confidence into the hearts of opposing defenders? Who will score when Adebayor and VdV leave? How will Sp*rs simlutaneously keep Prem-quality players and build a new stadium that won’t fill up for annual 12th place finishes? What is a Sandro? This and more on the next season of…As the Sp*rs Turn.

  5. Life is tough when you don’t have the resources that come from being Man City’s feeder club. 😦

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