So Chelsea won the Champions League on… ugh. I’ll try writing that again.
So a bunch of Chavs won the Champions League on Saturday. Unless you discovered football in 2003 AND you’re a fan of plaid flat brim hats or enjoy seeing buses being parked, you probably didn’t like that result. If you’re a Spurs fan who isn’t from the Former Soviet Republic of Buttfuckistan, you probably really, REALLY didn’t enjoy watching us get butt fucked out of a Champions League place. If you’re like me, you haven’t had a hangover yet, because you’re still drunk.
But its now the morning after, so as hard as it may be, its time for those of us to cheer ourselves up, because we already have something better than a Champions League place: Sylvie Van Der Vaart.
Suck it, Chelsea.